Hello World - We Ate So Many Apples and Founded a Company

Holy shit, do we love apples at Techaro. Like, an UNHEALTHY amount. This is the story of how our apple obsession accidentally created a tech company.

It Started With One Apple

It was a Tuesday. Xe was sitting at their desk, struggling with yet another bot traffic problem, when they grabbed a Honeycrisp apple from the kitchen. One bite. That’s all it took.

CRUNCH.

Suddenly, everything became clear. The sweetness. The texture. The way the juice ran down their chin. This wasn’t just fruit consumption—this was a religious experience.

The Apple Spiral Begins

Within 24 hours, the office was filled with apples. Granny Smiths. Red Delicious. Gala. Fuji. We had Apple (the fruit) before Apple (the company) even knew what hit them.

Mimi joined the apple cult on day three. “I was writing code,” she recalls, “and Xe just slid this perfectly crisp Pink Lady across my desk. I took one bite and my productivity increased by 347%.”

The correlation was undeniable: More apples = Better code.

The Great Apple Procurement Operation

By week two, we had established formal apple supply chains:

Local orchards: For that farm-fresh crunch
Grocery store partnerships: Bulk purchasing agreements
International imports: Because Canadian winters are apple-hostile
Emergency apple reserves: Hidden throughout the office

Our Slack channels became apple-focused:

#apple-reviews
#daily-apple-count
#apple-emergency-alerts
#general (which was just more apple talk)

The Apple-Driven Business Model

Here’s where it gets weird. Eating apples made us so productive that we accidentally solved all our technical problems. Bot traffic? Solved during an apple-fueled coding session. Client needs? Addressed between Gala and Granny Smith breaks.

Other companies give you problems. We give you solutions… powered by apples.

We realized we had stumbled onto something revolutionary:

Eat apple
Gain divine coding insight
Build incredible software
Repeat

The Apple Infrastructure

Our office is now 37% apple-related infrastructure:

Apple storage facility: Climate-controlled for optimal crispness
Apple preparation station: Industrial-grade apple corers and slicers
Apple waste management: Composting system for maximum sustainability
Apple quality control lab: Because not all apples are created equal

We measure everything in apple units:

Meeting duration: 2.3 apples
Sprint velocity: 47 apples per story point
Server uptime: 99.9% (we blame the 0.1% on insufficient apple consumption)

The Science Behind Apple-Driven Development

We’ve conducted extensive research (while eating apples) and discovered:

Honeycrisp apples: Boost creativity by 156%
Granny Smith apples: Improve debugging skills
Red Delicious apples: Enhance client communication (despite what apple haters say)
Gala apples: Perfect for all-nighters
Fuji apples: Ideal for system architecture decisions

The secret is in the pectin. Or the fiber. Or maybe it’s just the satisfying crunch that clears your mind. We don’t question it—we just eat more apples.

Our Apple-Powered Services

Every service we offer is apple-enhanced:

Digital Transformation: We eat apples while modernizing your systems
Data Analytics: Apple-fueled insights into your business data
AI Solutions: Machine learning models trained on apple consumption patterns
Content Marketing: Blog posts written during intense apple-eating sessions (like this one)

The Anubis Apple Connection

Fun fact: Anubis was created during our Great Apple Binge of 2024. We consumed 2,847 apples in 72 hours and emerged with a fully-functional anti-bot solution featuring a GNOME anime woman.

Coincidence? We think not.

Join the Apple Revolution

We’re always looking for fellow apple enthusiasts to join our team. Think you can handle the apple intensity? Think you can code while consuming 12-15 apples per day?

We’re not just building the future of Canadian tech—we’re building it one apple at a time.

Ready to crunch your way to success? Get in touch and bring your own apples.

This post was written while consuming 7 Honeycrisp apples and 3 Granny Smiths. No apples were wasted in the making of this company.